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Other stories by AdrianJ

Capital braces itself for 48-hour Tramp strike

Last minute conciliation talks between Transport for London and The Tramps, Vagrants and Beggars Union broke down today, when the leader of the TVBU, Big Rabbie McLintock, kicked London Mayor, Boris Johnson, in the shins and shouted, ‘Feck off youse mop headed bassard – I’ll fekkin ave ya!’

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Posted: Sep 21st, 2009
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AdrianJ

UN mix-up sees Chuckle Brothers appointed Middle East peace envoys

Embarrassed UN officials today confirmed that Barry and Paul Chuckle, the much-loved children’s entertainers, have assumed joint responsibility for the role of the UN’s Peace Envoy to the Middle East following ‘some confusion at the office of our PR firm’.

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Posted: Sep 17th, 2009
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AdrianJ

Bank of England forced to delay cash injection after Economy Pump breaks down

The Bank of England’s plans to pump another £50bn into the economy, in order to keep interest rates unchanged, have been put on hold this evening after their 200-year-old Economy Pump broke down under the strain.

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Posted: Aug 9th, 2009
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AdrianJ

Mystery of Stonehenge solved following discovery of 5000-year-old planning application

locals outraged, but recognised opportunity for career progession‘Stonehenge was going to be the world’s first out of town shopping centre,’

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Posted: Jun 24th, 2009
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AdrianJ

Couple complain to NASA after Hubble telescope re-installed pointing wrong way

NASA admitted a ‘minor blunder’, has resulted in the recently repaired Hubble Telescope being returned to orbit upside down. Astronomers across the globe have subsequently been collecting data not on the undiscovered cosmos, but on 32 Holwell Gardens, the semi-detached home of Bob and Janine Cooper.

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Posted: May 20th, 2009
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