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Other stories by Gerontius

Brain op goldfish to become Tory candidate

A goldfish that recently underwent brain surgery could become a Tory candidate in time for next year’s general election, says the prime minister. Mr Cameron told Conservative party members gathering in Birmingham ahead of the party conference that the goldfish had displayed all the qualities necessary to make a first class Tory candidate and would [...]

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Posted: Sep 16th, 2014
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Gerontius

ITV’s ‘Celebrity Squares’ facing copyright claim from Neanderthals

A spokesman for the community of Neanderthals has accused Group M Entertainment of ‘blatant copyright infringement’ amid claims the format for ITV’s ‘Celebrity Squares’ is based on one of their original ideas.

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Posted: Sep 12th, 2014
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Gerontius

Free school meals to include ‘pony and rabbit’

Education Minister David Laws says that free school dinners for primary school children will include ‘rabbit and pony’.

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Posted: Sep 8th, 2014
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Gerontius

New Dr Who series abandoned due to passport backlog

Plans for the new Doctor Who series have been put on hold after a passport backlog at the Home Office forced the Time Lord to cancel a planned journey through time and space.

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Posted: Aug 25th, 2014
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Gerontius

German war veterans wake up early to lay wreaths before British

Allied war veterans who got up extra early to lay tributes on the graves of fallen comrades were dismayed to find the Germans had got up even earlier, laid their wreaths on the graves and were already back at the hotel enjoying an early breakfast.

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Posted: Aug 4th, 2014
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