NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Other stories by Long Distance Clara

European flooding latest: God tells Nigel Farage to build ark

2 by 2 policy 'under review'UKIP leader Nigel Farage today revealed that he has been instructed by God to build an ark in order to protect sane, anti-European thinkers like himself from the rising flood waters which God has sent to central Europe as a punishment for the incompetence and bureaucracy of the European Union…

Read more >

Posted: Jun 3rd, 2013
More from Faith, Politics



Long Distance Clara

Ronnie O’Sullivan retires, un-retires, retires again during mid-session interval

Enigmatic reigning World Snooker Champion, Ronnie O’Sullivan, today retired, changed his mind and then reverted to his original decision again during the 10-minute break between sessions in his quarter final match at the Crucible Theatre, Sheffield.

Read more >

Posted: May 1st, 2013
More from News In Brief



Long Distance Clara

After 23 years, Phil Mitchell finally clears throat

More than 20 years after his first appearance on long-running soap opera EastEnders, the popular character of Phil Mitchell has at last got round to clearing his throat, suddenly enabling him to talk like a normal person.

Read more >

Posted: Feb 17th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Long Distance Clara

Advertisement Feature: This year’s must-have Christmas gift for home and garden – the Plebgate

Available in exquisite wrought-iron moulding, this beautiful relic of aristocrat sensibility is the perfect gift for anyone who wants a purpose-made access point for visiting tradespeople and regrettable lower-class acquaintances.

Read more >

Posted: Dec 24th, 2012
More from Features, Politics



Long Distance Clara

Valuables ‘missing’ after Queen’s visit to Downing Street

Search of Buckingham Palace 'could take a while' Prime Minister David Cameron has been put in an awkward position after staff at No.10 reported the disappearance of a number of wallets, handbags and mobile phones immediately following the Queen’s visit to Downing Street yesterday.

Read more >

Posted: Dec 18th, 2012
More from Politics, UK News