A group of alien supervillains have admitted defeat in their evil plans to subjugate the world starting at Shanklin, Isle of Wight. ‘We decided that there were just too many superheroes and too much advanced defence technology in New York, [read...]
The president vowed that the US would stand bigly behind its fabulous ally Japan and added that he won their round 5-and-4, which was the first time America has won in years. [read...]
Media analysts are warning that the impending release of the film ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ could lead to a sudden spike in spurious, made-up tosh in newspapers that could be used as an excuse to print a picture of a half-naked woman tied up and blindfolded in order to sell a few extra copies. [read...]
Exclusive to NewsBiscuit, read the first chapter of a brand new edition of Charles Dickens’s Hard Times, revised and updated to commemorate Theresa May’s historic visit to Washington to meet President Trump.
Following the successful reintroduction of paupers’ funerals, in which local authorities arrange the details and recover any costs they can from the dead person’s estate, the next phase of the government’s reintroduction of pre-Victorian values will see the return of mass hangings at Tyburn. [read...]