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Other stories by Quaz

Woman sues over misleading cocktail names

Isle of Wight resident Vickie Jones is suing a Ventnor cocktail bar claiming that the bar’s drinks failed to live up to the promise of their names.

‘I ordered Sex On the Beach and a Slow Comfortable Screw Against the Wall, followed by a Screaming Orgasm. All I got was a disappointing knee trembler up against a skip behind Asda,’ complained a very frustrated and emotional Mrs Jones while ordering a Red Headed Slut schnapps with a Cheeky Vimto cocktail.

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Posted: Dec 28th, 2009
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Quaz

Soho sex shops win World Heritage status

London Mayor Boris Johnson has today announced that the UN’s World Heritage Status is to be conferred on the last remaining sex shops and strip clubs in London’s Soho.

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Posted: Dec 16th, 2009
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Quaz

Girl awarded VC for clearing Lego bricks from brother’s floor

Bethany’s work has been likened to the anti-landmine campaign by the late Princess Diana.

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Posted: Dec 2nd, 2009
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Quaz

Hunt for ‘female Viagra’ over as doctors discover ‘shopping’

Men poor at shopping foreplay; just like to get in and outScientists have found that a man presenting his credit card in exchange for shoes, clothes and handbags can do wonders for a woman’s sex drive.

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Posted: Nov 19th, 2009
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Quaz

Mary Poppins banned from child minding

spoonful of sugar, my arse.Self styled ‘nanny’ Mary Poppins has today been served with a court order banning her from all child minding activities. Following the hearing, the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea’s Social Services department issued a statement outlining the reasons for the order.

‘Ms Poppins, of no fixed abode, has no recognised child care qualifications from any accredited organisation. Her previous employer, a Mr Banks, raised a number of concerns with us including her administration of spoonfuls of an unidentified medicine to children in her care, all of them laced with unhealthy amounts of sugar

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Posted: Nov 15th, 2009
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