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Other stories by Stan

OAPs wield nudity weapon in fight against cutbacks

A group of elderly ladies from Buxton has promised not to issue a nude calendar this Christmas – provided the public pledge sufficient funds to keep their day care centre open.

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Posted: Dec 13th, 2012
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Stan

Unmarried middle-aged uncle won’t be putting kisses on cards this Christmas

'Santa doesn't exist, by the way. He's just me.'Unmarried uncle of four, Derek Johnson, has decided not to put kisses on the Christmas card he is sending to his nephews and nieces this year.

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Posted: Dec 8th, 2012
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Stan

Record winning bid on tomato at Waitrose

‘We are seeing considerable growth in the market at the moment’ said auctioneer Brendan Southgate, ‘This particular tomato has some bruising damage from the vine twig, but as many owners are ‘distressing’ their soft fruit for a vintage look, it only added to the saleabiltiy.’

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Posted: Nov 2nd, 2012
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Stan

Ventriloquist secret of Party Leaders’ autocue free speeches

Top ventriloquist, Alan Reeder, has blown the whistle on our party leaders’ note free speeches by revealing that he is, quite literally, the voice behind David Cameron and Ed Miliband.

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Posted: Oct 5th, 2012
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Stan

Run away girl complains about teacher’s paperwork burden

Megan Stammers, the teenage girl who ran away with her teacher, has admitted that life with the 30 year old hadn’t proved to be quite as she had imagined.

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Posted: Oct 1st, 2012
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