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Earth landing ‘totally faked’, claim Martian conspiracy theorists

no way home One small slime trail for a Martian…

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Posted: Jul 12th, 2015
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SuburbanDad

Islamic State launches comparethejihad.com

at last, real choice in the Jihadi marketplaceIslamic state hopes to help jihadists “find a way of waging war against the infidel that’s right for you” by launching a jihad comparison website, it was confirmed today. “There’s a huge confusing market, particularly in afterlife care,” said a spokesman. “Al Shabab in the Maghreb has instant paradise on a kill-as-you-go deal, whereas Al Qaeda in the Yemen is offering unlimited virgins on a 24 month contract. How do you decide?”

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Posted: Jun 23rd, 2015
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SuburbanDad

NHS to be rebranded as ‘Britain’s Got Illness’

they'll make you laugh, they'll make you cry‘Patients seeking treatment will see healthcare professionals, sitting behind a desk with a buzzer’.

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Posted: Jun 19th, 2015
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SuburbanDad

Pope/Bear hybrid found in Vatican toilets

Scientists confirmed yesterday that the hairy creature found squatting under a washbasin at St Peter’s was one of two escaped ‘Papa-Ursus’, the world’s first creatures to combine both papal and ursine DNA.

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Posted: Mar 19th, 2015
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SuburbanDad

Church of England ‘forces women into bobble hats’

the Devil doesn't wear Pom PomsCovering should be ‘fluffy, preferably woollen, with a pom-pom on top’.

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Posted: Mar 5th, 2015
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