‘We’d tried the sound of gently lapping waves, birdsong and Beethoven’s Pastoral Symphony and none of it was helping the mother whale in the slightest.’
Posted: Nov 5th, 2010
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Peter ‘completely misread the signals’ between himself and work colleague Shirley
Posted: Aug 23rd, 2009
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A lorry driver from the West Midlands was celebrating today after finally succeeding in overtaking another lorry. Tom Shepheard, 47, began the manoeuvre shortly after his 30th birthday while travelling 0.02mph faster than the vehicle ahead.
Posted: Apr 22nd, 2009
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A group of North East MPs has called for the Government to nationalise struggling Premier League team Newcastle United. ‘It’s not about money’ said their spokesman. ‘Just like the banks, it’s all about confidence, and that’s what our lads lack at the moment – well, that and goals, obviously.’
Posted: Apr 11th, 2009
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Out-of-work British workers are to be taught how to sound foreign in order to make them seem more employable, the government has announced. Classes in Polish intonation are being developed which centre on the use of the letters W and Z in everyday conversation.
Posted: Apr 8th, 2009
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