Climatologists across the globe have expressed concern that the retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson will result in temperatures being lowered across the planet. The impact of no-hairdrying on match days and the elimination of daily assaults against the BBC is expected to reduce temperatures by around 15 degrees Celsius and may lead to icebergs forming in the Red Sea.
Posted: May 10th, 2013
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Sir Mervyn King, Governor of the Bank of England, has revealed that he has been asked to draw up plans in the increasingly likely scenario that Britain will have to leave the Pound.
Posted: Apr 6th, 2013
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Whilst many of today’s trendy youngsters dream of ‘Swimming with dolphins’ in US-style theme parks, the 50+ generation is increasingly remembering youthful days spent in local rivers and canals ‘Swimming with condoms’ and now lament the disappearance of the french letter experience.
Posted: Mar 21st, 2013
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Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has announced that the NHS will welcome an additional 20,000 voluntary reservists who will step in to replace those trained professionals being made redundant in NHS ‘restructuring’.
Posted: Jan 25th, 2013
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BBC bosses shocked their rivals today by announcing a new TV drama based on the extraordinary working and private lives of St John Ambulance volunteers. The drama named ‘Do you want a glass of water?’ is based on the hectic activities of the volunteers as they attempt to help the public cope with minor injuries and ailments.
Posted: Jan 18th, 2013
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