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Other stories by bonjonelson

Baker refuses to decorate ‘World’s Best Dad’ cake

‘At first I couldn’t understand why she had written such a thing,’ said Sonia Walkinshaw. ‘I know that Laura’s dad recovered from brain cancer and he did that charity climb on Kilimanjaro, but even so, no-one’s dad is better than mine.’

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Posted: May 23rd, 2015
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bonjonelson

Scottish Labour MPs ‘near extinction’, captive breeding program proposed

'Just lie back and think of Scottish Labour'Fears are growing for the Scottish Labour MP after a recent report suggests there may be only a single individual left in the wild. Experts have proposed a captive breeding program at Edinburgh Zoo to help increase their numbers for eventual release.

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Posted: May 8th, 2015
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Tesco to attract ‘better class of customer’ with Waitrose price-match

Tesco bosses have announced a new price-match promotion which they hope will attract a ‘better class of affluent customer’ into their stores. The price-match with Waitrose will guarantee that no equivalent product in Tesco is ever sold cheaper than Waitrose.

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Posted: May 3rd, 2015
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bonjonelson

Tracking bracelet for non-offenders launched – ‘Apple Watch’

A new big-government inspired tracking program for all citizens has been launched in the US, the UK and many other countries this week.

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Posted: Apr 28th, 2015
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bonjonelson

UKIP pledge to restore Marathon and Opal Fruits

The UKIP Election Manifesto has pledged to restore the British Marathon and Opal Fruit brands as part of their campaign to reverse what they call a ‘foreign conspiracy [to] … rebrand all our beloved product names to things that sound stupid when we ask for them in a shop’.

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Posted: Mar 27th, 2015
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