NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Other stories by bonjonelson

NASA to end 49-year-ban on clowns in space

clowns' discoveries of water in space by the bucket load turned out to be scraps of paperThe US national space agency today announced the long-expected reversal of their previous ban on clowns being allowed on manned space missions. Although it was relaxed in 1995 to a ‘Don’t Laugh, Don’t Tell’ policy, it still placed heavy restrictions on overt tomfoolery.

Read more >

Posted: Sep 20th, 2014
More from From The Archives



bonjonelson

Post-mortem reveals Paisley only grumpy because he was teething

The post-mortem into the death of Dr Ian Paisley has perhaps revealed the reason for his grumpy and bitter demeanour over the years – he was still teething.

Read more >

Posted: Sep 16th, 2014
More from News In Brief



bonjonelson

US Ebola missionary saved by ‘advanced experimental prayer’

US missionary Dr Kent Bradley was said today to be recovering at home after being given the all-clear after his prayers beat a nasty case of Ebola he picked up while working as a missionary in Liberia.

Read more >

Posted: Aug 23rd, 2014
More from News In Brief



bonjonelson

USA sends $47M to Gaza to build more targets for the Israelis

Last night US Congress agreed on an emergency package of $47 million to send to Gaza in order for them to construct better targets for the Israeli Air Force.

Read more >

Posted: Aug 19th, 2014
More from News In Brief



bonjonelson

Scottish Health Ministry warns against eating raw Mars Bars

Scottish Health ministry officials today issued an urgent report highlighting the growing risks from eating uncooked Mars Bars, claiming that the habit seems to have been introduced by visitors and immigrants from the south, who seem to be unaware of how the Mars Bar should be prepared for consumption.

‘A raw Mars Bar can contain up to five grams of saturated fat’, a Glasgow-based nutritionist confirmed, ‘which is way too little for our digestive systems to cope with. Deep frying it in lard is essential to ensure the healthy goodness of the bar slides effortlessly through the stomach and is absorbed in the lower intestines.’

Read more >

Posted: Aug 4th, 2014
More from Health