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Articles by Crayon
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Hipster fears he may like Dolly Parton unironically
Carter Peacock, a 22-year-old moustache and pubic hair counsellor from Hackney, is worried that he has dabbled in country and western music too deeply, and may now enjoy Dolly Parton in ways that are almost entirely without irony. [read...]
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Channel 4 says ‘The Prince and the Paedophile’ not about Charles and Bishop Ball
– nor Charles and Jimmy Savile – nor Charles and Archbishop Carey – nor Charles and Pope Francis – nor Charles and Andrew – nor Harry and Charles – nor Philip and Jimmy Savile – [read...]
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Home Office says ‘Britain bang on trend with pop-up police station’
Following cuts that include 30,000 police officers being made redundant and the closure of 600 police stations, Boris Johnson’s minority government has pledged to recruit 20,000 brand-new police officers, of which the first three will staff Britain’s new ‘pop-up police station and espresso bar’. [read...]
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Everything is ‘yours’ says your TV presenter
Your presenter of your TV programme that you’re half watching while reading this rubbish is yet again talking about something – either tangible or abstract – that apparently exists only in relation to yourself, according to your ears. [read...]