Following a dramatic decline in the mental faculties of the terminally embarrassing Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson, his devoted Prime Minister has desperately pleaded to send him for a career-ending procedure in the back streets of Buenos Aires. [read...]
During a recent media diagnostics test, data analysts believe they detected signals from the Maydroid (Beta Unit) that show it may have achieved some degree of self-awareness. When probed about possible discharges from a breach in its shell, [read...]
Britain’s mayfly community is seeking reparations from the Prime Minister for making a complete mockery of the name May, which they claim has left them less welcome than blowflies at a barbecue. Peter Mayfly, a spokesfly for May Pride, [read...]
Following the minority Conservative government’s so-called ‘confidence and supply’ deal with the DUP to buy the support of the DUP’s ten MPs at £100 million each for two years, a number of opposition MPs are also offering to sell their democratically elected souls for the same constituency-pimping price on the basis they may as well… [read...]
David ‘Chavschool’ Davis has boasted that his first time away from home since his Uncle Norman used to look after him was ‘brilliant’ and, because of his top skills and banter, getting all the things he wanted was ‘easy peasy smelly cheesy’. [read...]
