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Articles by Crayon
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UK neglects to threaten US with no-deal
In what some are calling a classic rookie mistake of counting your poker face before the chips have bolted, the UK is telling anyone who might be listening that it really, really wants to have a trade deal with the US without first pretending that it would be like totally cool if it had no… [read...]
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Larry the cat stalking 250 lb blonde rat
Larry, Downing Street’s most honourable resident, has spotted a filthy rat brazenly enter Number 10 via the back door, seemingly in pursuit of a pretty-posh young lady with a scent of blind ambition. The vermin has been identified as a Commons blonde rat (Rattus twattus) which breeds prolifically throughout the Home Counties. [read...]
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TODAY IN TIME – Throwing up old news in the face of now.
59 AD – Boudicca calls for a referendum to exit the Roman Empire, but only 52% of Britons support such a dangerous idea.
1946 – New York Hospital announce birth of Baby born with its head wedged up its own
arse,Parents to name child Donald. [read...]
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Opposition MPs offer their ‘confidence’ for a ‘supply’ of £100 million each
Following the minority Conservative government’s so-called ‘confidence and supply’ deal with the DUP to buy the support of the DUP’s ten MPs at £100 million each for two years, a number of opposition MPs are also offering to sell their democratically elected souls for the same constituency-pimping price on the basis they may as well… [read...]