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Russian pole vaulter ‘tried it once, but didn’t like it’

‘Is personal life-style things, so if you choose this way, OK, but you want keep them in separate. If you want do it, go outside by bins.’

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Posted: Aug 17th, 2013
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editor

Abu Qatada rails against British treatment after being flown Ryan Air

‘They added all sorts of charges and told me my hand luggage was too big. The food was a rip-off and they kept trying to sell me scratch cards.’

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Posted: Jul 7th, 2013
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editor

Daily Mail’s anti-porn campaign gathers pace with saucy summer swimwear shoot

The Daily Mail ratcheted up its campaign today for tighter controls on on-line pornography, by printing a series of bikini shots of young soap stars. The shots of the young bikini-body actresses in barely-there swimwear will pile the pressure on the government to make urgent changes.

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Posted: Jul 5th, 2013
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editor

Footy fans’ disappointment at loyalty of rubbish players

‘The worse thing Is, that all the crap players are still here, we need to get rid of them. They’re always asking us to be more patient and show a bit of loyalty to the players that are already at the club. It’s naive to expect that though, the club can’t halt their own ambitious out of a archaic view of loyalty.’

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Posted: Jun 2nd, 2013
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Disappointment for scientists as new super-computer fails to go mad

Scientists at Mal-Tech University, Wisconsin have expressed their immense disappointment at the failure of their new super-computer Off White to show any signs of megalomania.

The technological titan went online six months ago has since performed flawlessly, displaying nary a hint of sentience, lunacy or vague curiosity.

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Posted: May 29th, 2013
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