The Olympic opening ceremony, which included 10,000 dancing nurses, mime artists and the performance of every Shakespeare play, has been shortened in length. Lord Coe explained; ‘The problem was that several performers were also required for the closing ceremony and there was no way they could be in both.’
Posted: Jul 19th, 2012
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The Almighty has hit back at critics who claim that the creation of Earth was supposed to be completed in a day – and ended up costing far more than the original estimate. ‘That the original price was just for the Light and rocky bits. All the other stuff was extra.’
Posted: Jul 18th, 2012
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With a little over a week to go before the games’ opening ceremony, the Pope is to fast-track an application for recognition of the Olympic Flame as a Saint.
Posted: Jul 16th, 2012
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‘They were on us in a flash; all my tea and rich tea biscuits were swept away by a tsunami of camera crews and sharp suited hacks. Now everyone has seen my outdated bathroom suite and swirly patterned carpets it’ll months to get this place redecorated and back on its feet.’
Posted: Jun 24th, 2012
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A comprehensive survey of pub names has revealed the changing face of British pubs. The Campaign for Real Ale (CAMRA) survey has showed how a whole host of new names has burst on the scene, displacing many an old favourite.
Posted: Jun 10th, 2012
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