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Other stories by evilsuperstar

Austerity-conscious Queen downgrades 2012 Jubilee to ‘Diamonique’

Buckingham Palace has today announced that the Queen ‘wishes to recognise the fragile state of the economy’ by downgrading her Jubilee celebrations next year from diamond to diamonique.

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Posted: Jun 3rd, 2011
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evilsuperstar

NHS to combat GP appointment shortages by introducing placebo doctors

helps enormously if they're handsome with a hint of authorityThousands of non-medical practitioners will relieve the pressure on over-worked GPs, and at the same time raise the morale and sense of well-being of patients.

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Posted: May 1st, 2011
More from Health



evilsuperstar

Government to regulate scientists with regional accents

Minister for Universities and Science, David Willetts has written to further education establishments in England and Wales requesting that as part of their science courses they introduce mandatory modules on communication skills and elocution.
One government spokesman said the growing trend for ‘normal’ accents is ‘undermining the gravitas and integrity of British science and must stop right now.’

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Posted: Mar 21st, 2011
More from News In Brief



evilsuperstar

WackyStart to replace Sure Start Centres

The government plans to generate income by relocating all its ‘dull and worthy’ Sure Start Centres to the nearest ‘Wacky Warehouse’, a kind of life-size Playmobil toy, located inside a pub.

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Posted: Mar 1st, 2011
More from News In Brief



evilsuperstar

Government to merge roles of drug csar and dance csar

The latest round of government spending cuts has seen former Strictly Come Dancing judge Arlene Phillips combine the roles of dance csar and drugs csar, spearheading a confusing new anti-dance pro-drugs campaign, ‘Just Say Paso Doble’.

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Posted: Oct 20th, 2009
More from News In Brief