Following Emma Thompson’s appearance at the Extinction Rebellion demo, more stars of Love Actually are set to highlight the effects on the environment of booking a flight and hopping across the Atlantic. Director Richard Curtis said that the cast felt morally obliged to act on this defining issue of our time as nothing could be worse than the impending climate disaster humanity has wreaked on the planet. [read...]
Mastermind host, John Humphrys, has been told to quit the show for a much worse deal fronting eternally shit game show, Blankety Blank The timely advice comes after the veteran broadcaster, in a moment of inspiration, [read...]
The long-term viability of genetically-modified (GM) crops has been called into question, after members of an anti-GM group were viciously assaulted by roaming wheat columns larger than a double-decker bus.
Protestors broke into the Hertfordshire field where the feisty crop is being grown with the intention of uprooting it and setting it alight, [read...]
Remain voter, Frank Wilson, who is about to undergo potentially dangerous surgery to remove a suspect lump has been told the decision is final. Cavalier oncologists at the Royal London want to remove a “dodgy-looking” growth from Mr Wilson’s spine, [read...]
A Vodafone user has been unable to ditch his girlfriend because his signal is total wank, it has emerged. Mobile phone owner and horny first-year student, Sean Wilson, has been trying to phone partner, Sophie Goodier, [read...]