The rising price of muesli across the globe is proof that the international trade in this illicit breakfast cereal is finally ‘in retreat’ according to the UK’s Serious Organised Crime Agency.
Posted: May 15th, 2012
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‘Still, at least it’s better than Francis Maude’s recent ‘Panic Immediately And Turn Your Garage Into A Potentially Exploding Death-Trap’ campaign.’
Posted: Apr 23rd, 2012
More from News In Brief
The United States has woken up to what has been described as ‘the greatest indignity the free world has had to suffer’ after park rangers at Mount Rushmore National Memorial discovered four pairs of enormous buttocks poking out of the other side of the famous presidential monument in the early hours of this morning.
Posted: Apr 16th, 2012
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‘Today’s viewing public don’t care if a contestant’s unemployed Asperger’s Syndrome granny’s dying wish is to see them make the big time, we just want fatter, poorer and less attractive people than us humiliating themselves live on stage – it’s the ultimate in feelgood television.’
Posted: Apr 4th, 2012
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Britain’s only wardrobe inspector has announced that he is hanging up his tapping gloves after the ‘umpteenth’ beating from a jealous husband left him with several fractured ribs and serious facial injuries.
Posted: Mar 15th, 2012
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