The rising price of muesli across the globe is proof that the international trade in this illicit breakfast cereal is finally ‘in retreat’ according to the UK’s Serious Organised Crime Agency. [read...]
‘Today’s viewing public don’t care if a contestant’s unemployed Asperger’s Syndrome granny’s dying wish is to see them make the big time, we just want fatter, poorer and less attractive people than us humiliating themselves live on stage – it’s the ultimate in feelgood television.’ [read...]
The playful spat between veteran broadcasters David Dimbleby and Jeremy Paxman has been blown apart after fellow political pundit John Humphrys appeared on live radio sporting a full array of metallic genital piercings. [read...]
Following the signing of former Top Gear presenters Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May, online retail and media giant Amazon have announced plans to ‘physically stream’ the maverick trio into viewers’ homes via Prime Air drones. [read...]
Britain’s only wardrobe inspector has announced that he is hanging up his tapping gloves after the ‘umpteenth’ beating from a jealous husband left him with several fractured ribs and serious facial injuries. [read...]
