NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Other stories by nealdoran

Bob the Builder sacked as middle-class parents demand more aspirational kids’ TV stars

Bob the Builder was the highest profile casualty this week as children’s TV channel Cbeebies responded to the demands of its aggressively guilt-ridden parent viewers to ditch the glamorisation of working- to lower-middle class jobs in favour of animated characters pursuing careers ‘that make risking negative equity to get in the right school’s catchment area worthwhile’. As part of a new commitment to quality the BBC has cancelled all shows starring members of the construction industry, postal workers, or ‘any job where there’s a chance their children could be unionised’.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 5th, 2010
More from Arts/Entertainment



nealdoran

Advertising Feature; Guys! Recover your lost youth with new L’Oreal nasal hair dye

New formula for unsightly grey pubes also coming out in the Autumn‘Give your greying nostrils that luxurious just-blown glow.’

Read more >

Posted: Apr 2nd, 2010
More from Features



nealdoran

Nick Clegg becomes heroin addict in last-ditch bid for media attention

had to get in the papers somehowNick Clegg, reportedly leader of the Liberal Democrat party, announced in a press conference on Tuesday that he has now developed a full-blown addiction to Class A drugs as sign of his dedication to raising the profile of his party.

Clegg, who has struggled to gain the public recognition and popularity of his predecessors, and who is now being upstaged by the new ‘tough guy’ image of the Prime Minister, and even the pregnant wife of the Conservative leader, announced to a press conference held in a drugs den in Harlesden that his decision was a sign of the commitment he had to leading his party to power, and that Liberals should return to their constituencies and ‘prepare to be governed by a junkie strung out on shit, man.’

Read more >

Posted: Mar 24th, 2010
More from Politics



nealdoran

Woman ‘psychologically broken’ by relentless interrogation at branch of Subway

A London office worker has broken down under the relentless questioning of staff at fast food outlet Subway, confessing her most intimate personal secrets, as well as her preference for a six-inch ham sub.

Read more >

Posted: Mar 23rd, 2010
More from News In Brief



nealdoran

Pope unites with Dawkins to decree: ‘It’s the people that claim to be ‘a bit spiritual’ that are the real pain-in-the-arses’

Both agreed to have a dig at acupuncture‘It’s the ones who start getting mystical about life forces, and presence, and trees, for heaven’s sake’.

Read more >

Posted: Jan 12th, 2010
More from Faith, Lifestyle