A fruitless row over biscuit choice has ended the Downing Street talks aimed at agreeing a Brexit deal. Both sides agreed there could not be a ‘no biscuit’ tea time situation for the talks, which have now been going on for three weeks. [read...]
DJ Danny Baker has begged for one more chance to maintain his image as honorary third member of Chas n Dave, after being sacked from his job of being a bit of a geezer. ‘Look it woz only after a butchers in the mirror that I realised a stupid titfer had somehow descended on me… [read...]
A senior cabinet minister who preferred not to be named Philip Hammond at this point, has denied being the top level leaker in the Huawei leak scandal
‘As it’s clear I would never do such a thing, [read...]
The following secret and anonymous memo labelled Perfidious Albion and circulated to all ERG members has been obtained. It gives tips to members on how to disrupt the EU parliament, when elected:
• During debates, [read...]
‘Like the best ideas, this came to me in the middle of the night,’ said the 72-year-old psychic and cutlery distorter. ‘Taking a leak in the wee hours gave me the idea of leaks in general, [read...]
