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The news before it happens…

Other stories by ronseal

BBC finds US man who actually cares what British think of his country’s election

man simply adores the One ShowThe BBC has discovered an American who actually cares what the British think about who wins the US presidential election.

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Posted: Nov 6th, 2012
More from Arts/Entertainment



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Football transfer-talk journalist in showdown talks with bosses

Gary O’Shea, once fêted as one of football’s best young transfer speculation writers, is believed to be in make-or-break talks with his manager at The Sun’s sport pages.

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Posted: Nov 1st, 2012
More from Sport



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Met Police confident they are ‘closing in’ on Jimmy Savile

Commissioner Bernard Hogan-Hows-About-That-ThenRocked by criticism that his force was slow to act on previous concerns about people in the media, Metropolitan Police Commissioner Bernard Hogan-Howe has promised to immediately ‘get tough’ on Jimmy Savile and issued an uncompromising ultimatum to the alleged serial sex offender.

Drawing himself to his full height, the self-styled no-nonsense action hero issued a public warning to the dirty DJ: ‘Hand yourself in now or we will find you and bring you in to answer some very serious questions. And don’t think you can get away with just because you’re dead.’

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Posted: Oct 9th, 2012
More from UK News



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Corporate execs welcome news that liking football ‘no longer compulsory’

Impressionable middle-managers were cock-a- hoop last night as it emerged that football has finally gone ‘off trend’.

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Posted: Oct 1st, 2012
More from News In Brief



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FA launches ‘Let’s Kick Climate Change Denial Out of Football’ campaign

crowds insisting that never in a million years was that offsetFootball fans who make offensive chants about wind turbines could face stiff jail sentences.

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Posted: Sep 28th, 2012
More from From The Archives