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Other stories by ronseal

Man still being studiously ignored in room full of elephants

Despite hovering by the peanuts and desperately trying to make eye contact, Dave Harris is still finding it hard to get noticed by the largely elephantine occupants of The Room.

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Posted: Sep 1st, 2014
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Everyone hates you, says new survey by The Office Gossip

A new survey by The Office Gossip, in conjunction with the Sidekick and verified by The Enabler, has found strong evidence that everyone hates you.

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Posted: Aug 21st, 2014
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New app offers manly friendship that stops you mid-sentence with glib advice

there's a prat for that!The new Glib Advisor, currently available on Android but coming to the iPhone soon, will offer manly friendship to isolated men on the go.

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Posted: May 19th, 2014
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As Christmas looms, man dreads relatives asking ‘What exactly do you do?’

Metaphors, anecdotes and comparisons with occupations from a bygone age are all hopeless when explaining ‘what exactly is it you do’, according to a new report.

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Posted: Dec 5th, 2013
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Dogs having to impregnate too many ‘Sorry You’re Leaving’ cards with bum smells

‘Once it was only when a long-standing pack member was leaving,’ said Monty, a border terrier. ‘These days, the plain brown envelopes come round to celebrate the birth of a colleague’s puppies, a successful de-worming and even a new basket. I’m fed up with having to cock my leg to congratulate some bitch I barely know.’

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Posted: Oct 29th, 2013
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