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The Hardcastle family say they’re probably not going to buy a 40-inch 100Hz HD Ready LCD TV with all-around Dolby sound this Christmas

nothing on anyway‘I know that in January we’ll both miss that sinking feeling when you get the bill and know you can’t pay it, but I expect this year we’ll put the tele and the kettle on and get over it.’

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Posted: Nov 18th, 2014
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roybland

India to erect statues of George Osborne

During his tour of India drumming up business, the Indian government has announced it is to honour UK Chancellor George Osborne with statues of him in some of the country’s holiest places.

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Posted: Jul 12th, 2014
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Tour de France latest: Yorkshire folk ‘adopting French ways’

Vive les rosbifs!The population of Yorkshire has really taken the Tour de France to heart and is beginning to adopt French mannerisms and tastes as a result, according to reports coming in from ‘God’s own County’.

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Posted: Jul 8th, 2014
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Strict bedtime for young offenders to solve sperm shortage

A ruling by Justice Secretary Chris Grayling that from August all young offenders will have to be in their cells with lights out by 22:30 may solve the UK’s sperm shortage says the British Fertility Society, which said that this ‘may have untapped a major supply of sperm for us at a time of drastic shortages’.

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Posted: Jun 30th, 2014
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‘Messing about still core to curriculum’, says OFSTED report

Messing and mucking about is still the most important part of the school curriculum for most pupils, according to OFSTED. ‘It’s my favourite bit,’ said Brett, a year eight pupil at Scunthorpe Comp, ‘though school dinners when it’s double burger, chips and beans is good.’

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Posted: Jun 29th, 2014
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