The Empire confirmed today it is closing the Death Star with immediate effect, and promised ‘full co-operation’ with the official investigation into alleged illegal practices over a number of years, culminating in the destruction of the planet Alderaan. [read...]
Die-hard brexiteers dying without repentance will dwell for all eternity in a hellish simulacrum of the seat of European power, God confirmed today. ‘No-plan-no-dealers had every chance to say sorry’ said the Lord Almighty. ‘Not for them the blessed afterlife of a liberal, [read...]
An anti-capitalist protester camping outside St Paul’s Cathedral in London confirmed today that the experience has inspired him to start ‘ProtestEx’ – the world’s first event management company dedicated to ‘making sure your bid to overthrow the status quo goes without a hitch’. [read...]
‘In stable number 6 we had a radio, tv, everything. Back in Piraeus my bank had just repossessed the stereo – what did I have to lose?’ [read...]
The website Mumsnet was on its knees yesterday after a mum used its message boards to debut her “male equivalent of a MILF”. [read...]
