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Dale Farm travellers face barrage of demands for feedback about council services

Expensive paperwork. Dale Farm residents 'could do it cheaper'.Mr Derek O’Hara, a former resident of the controversial site, described Basildon Council’s customer service drive as ‘poor to very poor. I’d say 3 out of 10’.

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One-year countdown begins to world dwile flonking championships in Cowes

hoping for meadal gloryAn exciting event is being held on the Isle of Wight today to mark the start of the 2012 dwile flonking championships in one year’s time.

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‘Busty Mayoress Pamela Snips Wet Nurses’ Ribbon’ reports Shanklin Argus’s newly-recruited reporter

waking the deadA crowd of bikini-clad nurses cheered as buxom Mayoress Pamela Outhwaite, 43, formally opened the Nurses’ Social Club swimming pool, writes our new community reporter who has just joined the Argus from a top national newspaper.

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Isle of Wight opens ‘CodgerWorld’, Britain’s first theme park for the elderly

‘Our centre offers the perfect place to keep the island’s key demographic occupied,’ said founder, Margret Briscoe, ‘and is ideally situated just a short bus ride from Sandown’s glamorous benches, bingo halls and fracture clinic.’

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Dog walking romance still hangs in the balance

little poppets never seem to tire of chasing tailRaymond Wilcox, a 43-year old analyst from Bromsgrove, has reported mixed results in his attempts to get a local woman into bed using their pet dogs.

Wilcox met attractive divorcee Anna Sheppard, 37, on the local common when his West Highland terrier Flint started playing with her Jack Russell bitch Molly. The sight of the two small dogs rolling happily around in the grass together prompted other dog owners to start referring to them as an engaged couple.

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