DigestiveBiscuit
‘We pride ourselves on being as authentic as possible, but some of our members probably took things a bit too far by shipping over some intercontinental ballistic missiles from Russia.’
An inventor from the Isle of Wight has launched a cutting-edge iPhone app that will ‘revolutionise’ the way people use semaphore, experts have claimed.
A crowd of bikini-clad nurses cheered as buxom Mayoress Pamela Outhwaite, 43, formally opened the Nurses’ Social Club swimming pool, writes our new community reporter who has just joined the Argus from a top national newspaper.
‘Our centre offers the perfect place to keep the island’s key demographic occupied,’ said founder, Margret Briscoe, ‘and is ideally situated just a short bus ride from Sandown’s glamorous benches, bingo halls and fracture clinic.’
Raymond Wilcox, a 43-year old analyst from Bromsgrove, has reported mixed results in his attempts to get a local woman into bed using their pet dogs.
Wilcox met attractive divorcee Anna Sheppard, 37, on the local common when his West Highland terrier Flint started playing with her Jack Russell bitch Molly. The sight of the two small dogs rolling happily around in the grass together prompted other dog owners to start referring to them as an engaged couple.
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