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Lost City of Atlantis; ‘we’ve been completely forgotten’

The world’s most famous flooded metropolis entered its fourth millennia under water this week as civic leaders claimed they had been totally overlooked by David Cameron’s government.

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Syrian war victims ‘cheered’ by win for Wiltshire supermarket campaigners

thank God their battle is finally overCivilians who have recently been evacuated from the besieged Old City of Homs in Syria have been cheered by news that, while their 18-month ordeal was going on under the eyes of the world, their comrades in the Wiltshire market town of Marlborough had at last succeeded in their campaign to get planning approval for a new Tesco on the outskirts of town.

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Cameron, Clegg and Osborne to star in new C4 docu-soap: ‘The Unrelateables’

There must be someone out there who can love themChannel 4 has announced its Spring schedule today, confirming that viewers will be treated to a unique documentary that explores the struggle to gain wider acceptance between those afflicted with Serious Political Influence (SPI), and ‘regular people’.

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Justin Bieber tipped for Toronto Mayor job

you better beliebe itThe 19-year-old ‘King of Teen Pop’ has confirmed via Twitter that he will be running for office in this year’s Toronto Mayoral elections.

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Politicians to replace faulty moral compass with new Ethical Sat Nav

Members of Parliament need never get lost againMPs are preparing for the arrival of a new piece of wearable technology that will help them navigate difficult terrain and always guide them towards the high moral ground.

The EPS, or Ethical Positioning System, operates by triangulating a person’s political standpoint via a number of morally aware ‘smart satellites’. If a politician starts to veer off course, perhaps about to break a manifesto pledge, the Sat Nav will interrupt with the message: ‘You are no longer on the agreed route, please perform a U-turn now.’

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