A new show on BBC about a disillusioned Vietnam vet who becomes a killing machine, and gets all the pussy he can handle, has proved a massive disappointment with war movie buffs.

Viewers had expected a story line about an American soldier from an elite military unit, whose anger and killing skills made for an explosive combination as he walked the tightrope of crime in the mean streets back home in Philadelphia. But instead of showing punks get blown away, the BBC screened a show about an animal doctor in modern day Ho Chi Min.

‘He seemed to be either in regional health committee meetings, or putting down old cats,” complained a furious viewer.

‘We warned that this would happen’, said Liz Matthews of The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents, ‘The start of the cricket season overlapped nicely with the end of the football, and the under 21 tournament segued nicely into Wimbledon, but this gap was always a concern. We urged the authorities to arrange a darts tournament or even just a snooker friendly, but they wouldn’t listen. And now it’s carnage out there’

Exigo