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Posts Tagged ‘Afghanistan’

New microfibre-semtex hybrid ‘makes incendiary pantyline less visible’

A new to-die-for range of incendiary panty line brief bombs threatens to fly off the shelves at outlets of the Taliban’s favourite shop, Martyrs and Spinsters.

The range of exploding underwear, a mixture of Semtex and wearable microfibres, promises to lift and separate martyrs like never before. ‘With these pants your buttocks will end up in different post codes,’ says one designer who worked on the new range, ‘and you’ll be lifted into paradise in no time.’

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Posted: May 11th, 2012
More from Lifestyle



Taliban leaders condemn ‘Daily Mail Law’ as barbaric and inhuman

A coalition of Taliban Leaders announced today their opposition to the ‘barbaric and inhuman’ regime of ‘Daily Mail Law’ and said they would be campaigning against its adoption in parts of Afghanistan.

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Posted: Dec 16th, 2011
More from News In Brief



Troops withdrawn from Afghanistan after failing health and safety workplace assessment

‘If we’d known that soldiers weren’t being provided with the correct style of ergonomic chair or that the temperature in the workplace was so high, we’d have shut the place down in a jiffy.’

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Posted: Dec 10th, 2011
More from UK News



Bomb disposal engineers to help elderly switch on central heating

should only be attempted by trained professionals with counsellors on standby The government is deploying crack army bomb disposal units to help Britain’s elderly switch on their central heating this winter.


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Posted: Oct 12th, 2011
More from UK News



Military careers day successfully avoids mentioning chances of being shot

A major UK Armed Forces Careers Day was declared a success by military chiefs after it passed without one reference to the reasonably high probability of becoming a fatality statistic upon signing up.

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Posted: Jul 31st, 2011
More from Features