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Posts Tagged ‘Afghanistan’

Troops to get Olympics Conflict medals

Soldiers serving in the militarised East London Province will be awarded medals on completion of their Olympics tour of duty, the Defence Secretary announced today.

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Posted: Jul 16th, 2012
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Soldiers would rather return to Afghanistan than serve at Olympics

When faced with the prospect of serving in a hostile, unfamiliar environment, many of the troops would prefer to be in Afghanistan.

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Posted: Jul 15th, 2012
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Robert Peston deployed to Afghanistan as a manned drone

He's NEV-er seen ANythinggg! LIKE it‘Peston’s role will be to reconnoitre enemy terrain, identify Taliban insurgents and then subdue them by talking for hours in his excruciatingly slow, dull monotone,’ explained the Defence Secretary.

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Posted: Jul 12th, 2012
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New microfibre-semtex hybrid ‘makes incendiary pantyline less visible’

A new to-die-for range of incendiary panty line brief bombs threatens to fly off the shelves at outlets of the Taliban’s favourite shop, Martyrs and Spinsters.

The range of exploding underwear, a mixture of Semtex and wearable microfibres, promises to lift and separate martyrs like never before. ‘With these pants your buttocks will end up in different post codes,’ says one designer who worked on the new range, ‘and you’ll be lifted into paradise in no time.’

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Posted: May 11th, 2012
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Taliban leaders condemn ‘Daily Mail Law’ as barbaric and inhuman

A coalition of Taliban Leaders announced today their opposition to the ‘barbaric and inhuman’ regime of ‘Daily Mail Law’ and said they would be campaigning against its adoption in parts of Afghanistan.

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Posted: Dec 16th, 2011
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