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Posts Tagged ‘Al Qaeda’

Government raises UK bullshit threat level to ‘severe’

The UK’s bullshit threat level has been raised from ‘substantial’ to ‘severe’ meaning that the possibility of impending bullshit is highly likely.

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2014
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Cameron raises terror threat level from ‘Boring’ to ‘Arms industry needs sales’

Some members of the public have found the whole process strangely reminiscent of ‘…pretty much every time a Government wants to justify going to war’. One déjà vu victim said: ‘It’s odd the things we are supposed to be scared of. The UK sells Weapons of Mass Destruction to the Middle East for decades – all is calm. Saddam Hussein pretends to have some – the shit hits the fan.

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Posted: Sep 1st, 2014
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ISIS rebrand to IS ‘a great success’, as group vanishes from Google results

The well-known barbarian horde has declared today that the work of its image consultants in reimagining its brand has ‘exceeded all expectations’.

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Posted: Aug 9th, 2014
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Airports to introduce self-scan check-in for terrorists

bombers expected to hand themselves in when machine goes 'beep' Major delays caused by terrorists being stopped by airport security could be a thing of the past following the introduction of self-scan check-in for international terrorist organisations.

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Posted: Jul 9th, 2014
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Terrorists to be allowed to blow up ugly buildings

government urging them to 'just get on with it'The new scheme has been described as a ‘win, win scenario’ by Home Secretary, Theresa May.

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Posted: Jun 25th, 2014
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