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Posts Tagged ‘Al Qaeda’

New microfibre-semtex hybrid ‘makes incendiary pantyline less visible’

A new to-die-for range of incendiary panty line brief bombs threatens to fly off the shelves at outlets of the Taliban’s favourite shop, Martyrs and Spinsters.

The range of exploding underwear, a mixture of Semtex and wearable microfibres, promises to lift and separate martyrs like never before. ‘With these pants your buttocks will end up in different post codes,’ says one designer who worked on the new range, ‘and you’ll be lifted into paradise in no time.’

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Posted: May 11th, 2012
More from Lifestyle

Bin Laden papers show a man ‘persuaded that America is best’

Health care proposals 'brilliant', says dead terroristNewly released papers from Osama Bin Laden’s hideout reveal a leader living in fear of the ‘mad skillz’ of the US Navy SEALs and struggling to control an unruly network, the US military says.

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Posted: May 10th, 2012
More from World News

Underwear of Swedish women ‘poses greatest airline security threat’

'boring job, but someone has to do it'A top security expert has warned that Swedish women pose the greatest threat to airline safety following the discovery of a more sophisticated underwear bomb.

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Posted: May 8th, 2012
More from World News

UN appoint Jeremy Kyle to lead international conflict resolution

'why can't we all just get along?'Kyle ‘will bring North and South Korea together’ live on his show.

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Posted: Apr 12th, 2012
More from World News

David Cameron ‘sorry’ for confusing President for ‘the butler in Fresh Prince’

Number 10 has been forced to apologise to The White House today, after cash-rich but culturally-poor old Etonian David Cameron, handed his bags to US President Barrack Obama, and greeted his wife Michelle with the phrase ‘two sugars please love, and for God’s sake heat the cup first.’

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Posted: Mar 14th, 2012
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