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Posts Tagged ‘Band Aid’

Ethiopian rains fail – fears grow of new Band Aid single

DJs and shops across the country have already begun clearing time on their playlists for the as yet unwritten and unrecorded single to confirm their support of the unconfirmed campaign, lest they be considered as unchristmassy as someone who doesn’t care for the Coca-Cola advert.

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Posted: Nov 11th, 2015
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Africans ‘perfectly well aware it’s Christmas’

‘The choir in my church started singing carols a couple of weeks ago and that reminded me,’ said Jonas Chigumbure, who is one of the few non-churchgoers in his neighbourhood. ‘However, I hadn’t been aware they had done that awful song again – well, at least thank God it’s them instead of us, eh?’

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Posted: Dec 17th, 2014
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Ebola promises to stop if Bob Geldof does

The highly contagious Ebola virus has issued a statement today announcing that it will stop causing pain and suffering throughout West Africa and the rest of the world if Sir Bob Geldof does the same.

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Posted: Nov 19th, 2014
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Bob Geldof to extend Band Aid concept to Boomtown Rats singles

The Great British Geldof‘It’s feckin’ genius,’ said the singer/songwriter, speaking about the fourth successful release of ‘Don’t They Know it’s Christmas?’ in thirty years. ‘I can’t believe it, surely they’ve cracked on to the date by now?’ he asked before launching into his new project.

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Posted: Nov 17th, 2014
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Geldof launches ‘Bank Aid’ as markets plummet

‘These people are losing their bonuses, their stock, their options… Please, just give us the fucking money.’

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Posted: Sep 19th, 2008
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