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Posts Tagged ‘BBC’

Count Dracula to present Top Gear, BBC announces

The BBC has announced that its search for a new Top Gear frontman is over. After a period of ‘thinking outside the coffin’, it has appointed Count Dracula as Jeremy Clarkson’s replacement on the grounds that the count, being dead already, need not worry about death threats and also bears a striking resemblance to Quentin Wilson.

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Posted: Apr 22nd, 2015
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George Osborne explains to interviewer that he ‘just doesn’t accept that’

The rebuttal came hot on the heels of a proposition put to Mr Osborne by a news reporter who was interviewing him at the time. ‘I asked the former Chancellor a question regarding his ability to do something or other.’ explained the reporter.

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Posted: Apr 14th, 2015
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Dave ‘can’t cope with any more witty banter’

Bosses at TV channel Dave have made an impassioned plea to commissioning editors of BBC and ITV to reduce their output immediately because Dave is no longer able to cope with their torrents of comedic waste. There have been regular complaints from the neighbouring History channel about the smell of Alan Davies wafting over.

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Posted: Apr 12th, 2015
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Plaid Cymru manifesto ‘slightly more interesting’ than Kate’s second baby

Plaid Cymru’s general election manifesto is of slightly more interest to the general public than is the prospect of the Duchess of Cambridge’s second baby, according to opinion polls.

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Posted: Apr 1st, 2015
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TV debates to be settled by ‘head punching contests’ say Broadcasters

all in the name of entertainment for the massesTV broadcasters have decided to ditch the debating format trialed in the 2010 election in which leaders debated policy and outlined pledges and will replace it instead with a series of ‘head punching contests’, confirmed Sue Inglish, Head of Political Programming at the BBC.

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Posted: Mar 27th, 2015
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