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Posts Tagged ‘Benedict XVI’

Pope’s ex-butler pleads ‘lock me up’ after Vatican threatens ‘almighty kicking’

benedictus sanctusFormer papal butler Paolo Gabriele has broken down in an Italian court and begged to be locked up, after receiving threats from the Vatican to ‘make that scene from Reservoir Dogs look like a Harvest f*cking Festival.’

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2012
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Leaked documents reveal Vatican plans ‘younger, sexier Pope’ next time round

Leaked documents have revealed that the Vatican plans to appoint a ‘much younger, hotter, sassier Pope’ next time the position becomes available in an effort to reach out to a new generation of churchgoers.

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Posted: Mar 11th, 2011
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Pope to ‘make himself useful’ on forthcoming UK visit

Archbishop of Westminster Vincent Nichols has defended the astronomical cost of the Pope’s forthcoming visit to the UK, explaining that Pope Benedict XVI will amongst other things be carrying out essential maintenance work to schools across the country.

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Posted: Sep 7th, 2010
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