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Posts Tagged ‘benefits’

Government now fears ‘extraterrestrial benefit spongers’

Aliens could claim child tax credits for children living outside the orbit of Pluto‘They’ll probably be concealing illegal migrants from somewhere or other in the solar system just here to scrounge or take our British jobs’

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Posted: Mar 9th, 2013
More from Politics



UK poor people must do more to help kill foreign poor people, says Defence Secretary

Defence Secretary Philip Hammond says that poor people in Britain should do more to help to kill poor people in other countries by taking a cut in their welfare benefits to allow much-needed funds for the armed forces.

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Posted: Mar 4th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Rival shelf-stacking dynasties clash over rights to price up aisle 13

it means everythingThe tinned foods aisle of a Wirral-based branch of Asda is locked in a bitter blood feud over who should price up the mushy peas, according to reports. The rival clans from Hoylake and West Kirby have amassed personal wealth estimated to be in the thousands after putting in extra night shifts at the store’s branch in Woodchurch.

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Posted: Feb 18th, 2013
More from UK News



Traces of meat found in poor people’s diets, admits Iain Duncan Smith

Minute traces of meat have been found in some meals consumed by poor people, according to the Department of Work and Pensions secretary Iain Duncan Smith.

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Posted: Feb 1st, 2013
More from News In Brief



Paralympic lions plan to catch benefit cheats

Sources at the Department for Work and Pensions have confirmed rumoured plans to release wild lions into Paralympic venues to catch out benefit cheats.

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Posted: Aug 31st, 2012
More from News In Brief