Through a diet of Peter Mandelson and regular exercise – running from his socialist principles – Labour’s deputy leader has revealed he is clear of all leftist tendencies. A slim-line Mr. Watson told reporters never again would he succumb to starchy trade unions or refined nationalization [read...]
Britain’s favourite war criminal is contemplating a return to ‘frontline politics’, which is ironic given his propensity for sending other’s people’s children off to be killed on ‘actual’ frontlines. In another completely unconnected story, Anthony Charles Lynton Blair welcomed the timing of Theresa May’s intention to protect human-rights abusers from prosecution. [read...]
Following in a long line of militarily and diplomatically inept Prime Ministers, Theresa May now has the difficult decision as to which nation to send back to the Middle Ages; through the usual combination of Black Ops and the missionary position. [read...]
While many did not expect to see the eschaton within their lifetime, Sir John Chilcot has scheduled his apocalyptic report into the Iraq War for the 6th of July. Many had wrongly assumed that the publishing date would be after the return of Jesus or, [read...]
Launched like a tortoise out of a grey-hound’s trap, The Daily Chilcott’s first headline was the revelation that: ‘computers may one day be can be networked together’. In further breaking news it predicts the creation of an ‘Internet’, [read...]
