Foreign secretary Boris Johnson has proposed a new post-Brexit export scheme. ‘Currently, erm, gosh, pork products are delivered using a complicated system of lorries, trains and ferries,’ said the unkempt white-haired serial shagger. ‘I’m confident that good old British know-how will introduce a new breed of hog with a delivery system that entirely works in… [read...]
A hoax-caller was tricked into believing that Boris Johnson is real person and not a skit involving Sacha Baron Cohen. The fake Foreign Secretary was able to maintain his ruse by pointing out that if David Davis could be a Minister, [read...]
Foreign Secretary Boris de Pfeffel Johnson is requesting a private plane to better facilitate his duties representing British interests abroad in a more efficient and prudent manner, also to avoid hordes of screaming fans. ‘Bojo! [read...]
Under pressure from the Government, Tesco’s have agreed to extend the length of time that Brexit negotiations can be left on the shelf. While the best before date for leaving the EU was 1973, Tesco’s have said they are willing to extend it to the Summer of 2052 – possibly later. [read...]
A furious row has broken out in Westminster over an initiative by UK Food Banks to celebrate the upcoming Royal Wedding on May 19th. In line with Meghan and Harry’s desire for the whole nation to celebrate with them, [read...]
