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Posts Tagged ‘Boris Johnson’

Politicians to be permanently sealed within giant Westminster Bubble

welcome to the pleasure domeThe multi-million pound Odium Project aims to collect every variety of politician, lobbyist and political journalist and keep them in a safe, temperature controlled environment.

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Posted: Sep 2nd, 2013
More from Environment, Politics



Government announces new Boris Johnson to be built in Thames estuary

‘The existing Boris Johnson was designed half a century ago for the needs a different era and is completely unsuited to the modern world,’ said Downing Street sources.

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Posted: Aug 13th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Met Police launches new recruitment drive aimed at divorced alcoholic mavericks

‘If your marriage is on the rocks, if you have a drink problem and if you have got a hunch, my message to you is this: We will find you and we will hire you.’

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Posted: Jul 26th, 2013
More from Arts/Entertainment, UK News



UK schools to revert to Roman numerals, announces Gove

In a move expected to be marginally less unpopular and unworkable than most of his other ideas, Michael Gove has announced that from 2014 UK schools will revert to teaching in Roman numerals.

The idea is the brainchild of a conservative think tank charged by the Education Secretary with charting the causes of the drastic decline in school standards in Britain since the withdrawal of the Roman Empire in 410 AD.

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Posted: Jun 18th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Chancellor now understands ‘why we cry’

surely just a pilot project which shouldn't be allowed outside NewhamScientists today expressed excitement that the pioneering android Chancellor, Gideon11, may have for the first time experienced something equivalent to human emotion.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2013
More from Politics