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Posts Tagged ‘Boris Johnson’

Boris Johnson launches new ‘Bicycle-Water-Cannons-For-Hire’ scheme

feel the powerBoris Johnson has today announced plans to launch the all new ‘Bicycle-Water-Cannons-For-Hire’ scheme in London, believed to be the first of its kind in Europe. ‘These new Boris Cannons are a tremendous wheeze,’ said the London Mayor today. ‘I have already spent the day riding around on one, hosing down the hoi polloi and washing away beggars from shop doorways. It’s tremendous fun.’

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Posted: Apr 2nd, 2014
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Commuters beg Unions to extend tube strike

the fresh air, the view, the mayor of London cycling by...London commuters begged London transport unions tonight to extend the current 48 hour tube strike indefinitely, citing “an immeasurable improvement to our quality of life and general well-being” since suspension of services began.

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Posted: Feb 5th, 2014
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London’s Tube Crisis – Russell Brand yet to comment

Confusion among Londoners over how they feel about the tube strike continues to grow as Russell Brand still hasn’t released any form of open letter about it.

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Posted: Feb 5th, 2014
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Stoke allotments shortlisted as viable option for new Heathrow runway

Heathrow’s third runway could potentially be sited on an allotment in Stoke on Trent, Airport executives today confirmed, after top level talks between Senior Heathrow Directors and committee members of Myrtle Lane Allotments Society went well.

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Posted: Dec 20th, 2013
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‘I think I’m just an idiot’, admits Boris Johnson in emotional YouTube video

Mayor of London Boris Johnson has come out as ‘utterly clueless about pretty much everything’, in an emotional five-minute YouTube video uploaded today.

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Posted: Dec 4th, 2013
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