Prime Minister Theresa May has snapped up all the gaps between the triangles of chocolate in Toblerones, it has been revealed today. The news comes just weeks after manufacturer Mondelez International announced that it was reducing the distance between chunks of the distinctively shaped white confectionary and was reverting to its original shape. [read...]
After some reluctance to take the job as it might jeopardise her benefits, as well as presenting the need to find childcare for those of her kids she hasn’t yet swapped for a Westlife CD, [read...]
Fred Cummins is facing the most difficult week of his very public divorce this week. Two years ago, Fred took the unusual step to announce his intention to finish his marriage by means of a public vote instead of using the courts. [read...]
The EU, having strenuously denied for a year and a half that it will never build a border across Ireland, has today been exposed as secretly planning to not do just that. A spokesman said that the matter of the border remains very controversial. [read...]
In an inspired piece of casting, the next super-villain to threaten Earth will be The Jacob, a time-travelling eccentric with plans to rear a super-race of Latin-speaking clones in top hats. ‘We’re working on his powers’, [read...]
