Britain’s huddled masses of urchins, scullions and paupers are today rejoicing at the news that their years of a diet of gruel are over, thanks to the goodwill of their government. ‘Kind Old Phil’ Hammond, [read...]
The Chancellor in his budget has promised a post-Brexit currency made up of ha’pennies, magic beans and the aroma of ‘regret’. While the new 50p will feature the two faces of Brexit – Bojo the Clown on one side and simmering racial tension on the other. [read...]
To the delight of parents and teachers, the Chancellor has promised to splash the cash on school essentials; such as 1 bottle of glue per 1,000 children, 1 compass per 10,000 children and 1 GCSE pass per 100,000 children. [read...]
Philip Hammond’s attempt to woo young voters and train-spotters with his Budget, has resulted in several hours of intrusive rectal surgery. NHS doctors assured the Chancellor that having a railcard forcibly inserted will cause no lasting damage, [read...]
Henry Willis, a 6 year-old pupil at Tunbridge Primary in Kent, has become increasingly agitated about his long-term financial security. In a heated discussion with parents, Geoff and Lynn, about family net worth, [read...]
