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Posts Tagged ‘Cameron’

Cameron says bombing Syria will work as he has special Pokemon cards

Despite senior generals saying UK will need boots on the ground to fight in ‘Stalingrad’ operations; to topple ISIS Mr. Cameron says a couple of Tornadoes will do it as he has limited edition Charizard and a shiny Blastoise that will give them special powers.

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Posted: Nov 30th, 2015
More from News In Brief

Cats still to decide on inside or outside referendum

The National Cat Association (NCA) has admitted that there is still no consensus about whether they want the free-market roaming that the garden represents or the warm monetary union offered by the airing cupboard.  A spokes-cat said: ‘We didn’t expect a swift decision; to be honest, it could be years.  What we will say is that shouting at us will not make it any quicker’.

Those in favour of staying indoors have said the deal has been sweetened by their German owner, offering additional squatting rights with any cardboard box, computer keyboard or lap of their choice.

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Posted: Nov 22nd, 2015
More from Lifestyle

Cameron demands Great ‘pig farm’ Wall in China

In a surprise announcement – seemingly timed to mirror the Chinese funded, French built and owned Nuclear Power station at Hinckley Point – the Barratt building company in conjunction with the British Government have announced that they will be build a New Great Wall Of China beginning next year.

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Posted: Oct 25th, 2015
More from News In Brief

Xi/Cameron transcript in full

Sipping a pint of his favourite bitter in the Plough at Cadsden, Xi Jinping enthused ‘mmm – hoppy as ever. I’ve missed this’. The Chinese premier confirmed that, whenever he is over, he makes a point of stopping off at the village pub to catch up with his mates, pet the dog and maybe play some darts.

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Posted: Oct 23rd, 2015
More from Politics

Cameron kicks off election campaign by blacking up

the biggest change yet seen in Gordon Brown's 'Age of change'.Tory leader David Cameron has made a controversial start to his election campaign today after appearing on the BBC’s Daily Politics show apparently in full face blacking complete with a tightly-curled wig.

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Posted: Oct 8th, 2015
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