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Posts Tagged ‘charity’

Persistent cold callers and chuggers face new ‘badgerer cull’

Cute, furry creatures 'don't stand a chance'Following last year’s unsuccessful culling campaign, the Government has today announced plans for a second attempt at reducing the ‘badgerer’ population

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Posted: Aug 27th, 2015
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Camila Batmanghelidjh told to simplify her name or else

kids v. idsWork and Pensions Secretary Ian Duncan Smith has ordered Kids Company boss Camila Batmanghelidjh to simplify her name or face instant liquidation of the charity that helps needy young people avoid contact with Conservatives. ‘Something like er, Margaret, or Theresa would be much more manageable and, as for the surname, well something a little bit English sounding would make our job of denouncing her as an evil thief that much more easy.’

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Posted: Jul 12th, 2015
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‘Charity Muggers’ is misleading and unfair on us, say actual muggers

The term ‘charity mugger’ was deemed offensive and unfair today by a leading Muggers’ Union. Often shortened to ‘chugger’, the phrase was coined to describe the charity agents who prey on innocent High Street shoppers in a bid to raise funds, but Andy Tover, chairman of the Alliance of Muggers and Street Thugs, said it was unfair to tar his members with the same brush.

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Posted: Feb 4th, 2015
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RSPB to focus efforts on saving Angry Birds

stepping up a levelAfter a series of charity scandals, cash-strapped conservation group the RSPB has announced that it will refocus its conservation efforts on saving the Angry Birds, rather than their real cousins.

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Posted: Dec 10th, 2014
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Isle of Wight coast threatened by huge slick of charity shop tat

slime 'everywhere'It survived the French invasion of 1545 and even the influx of five Polish would-be migrant workers, who were eventually seized and burned at the stake in Freshwater in 2009. Now, however, the pristine coastline of the Isle of Wight is facing its most deadly menace ever after an estimated 500,000 barrels of utterly appalling crap from charity shops leaked from an underground bunker near Portsmouth into the Solent.

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Posted: Jul 21st, 2014
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