Chelsea football club today dramatically increased the pressure on Manchester United to sell Wayne Rooney, by offering him a sack of potatoes and the unlimited use of a granny.
Posted: Jul 17th, 2013
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White smoke billowing from the Vatican’s Fiorentina End chimney this morning signalled a shock turn of the managerial roundabout at Europe’s top institutions of football and religion.
Chelsea’s interim manager, Rafa Benitez, has praised the talent of the ball boy who was kicked in the ribs by Eden Hazard, and complimented him for a fine display of ‘diving, time-wasting and simulating injury’ worthy of even the greatest Chelsea stars of the past.
Posted: Jan 24th, 2013
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Chelsea’s misfiring striker is being broken up and sold for parts, according to Brian Barnes, the club’s accountant.
Posted: Jan 22nd, 2013
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Newcastle United’s piece depicts a footballer pushing a wheelbarrow full of gold coins past a crowd of cash-strapped Geordies queuing to renew their season tickets.
Posted: Nov 27th, 2012
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