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Posts Tagged ‘chocolate’

A&E depts missed targets for selling over priced Wispa bars for a whole year

In a crushing blow to the NHS balance of payments, it has been revealed today that all targets for the sale of curly ham sandwiches and ‘slightly foxed’ chocolate bars from dispensing machines in Casualty departments have been completely missed.

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Posted: Jul 20th, 2014
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Cardboard Easter egg ‘an abuse of human rights’, claims Norris, 11

‘Norris’s expectations were cruelly but understandably raised by the attractive product packaging and he had a reasonable right to believe there may be chocolate inside,’ explained the child’s lawyer.

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Posted: Apr 18th, 2013
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Milky Bar Kid ‘responsible for obesity crisis’

He was strong and tough, and only the best was good enough, but now The Milky Bar Kid faces widespread condemnation for single-handedly kicking off what experts say could be a crisis of epidemic proportions.

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Posted: Sep 6th, 2011
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Cadbury denies lower fat Dairy Milk bar ‘actually just smaller’

Cadbury’s has insisted cuts in the size of Dairy Milk from 140g to 120g is nothing to do with costs, but is providing a product containing 14% less fat ‘and still only 99p!’.

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Posted: Feb 4th, 2011
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‘Inhuman’ thieves ransacked advent calendar, claims mum

Dewsbury mother Dawn Guthrie was devastated when she returned home from work to find that all the doors on her advent calendar had been smashed in and the entire contents stolen by thieves.

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Posted: Nov 23rd, 2010
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