NewsBiscuit

The news before it happens…

Posts Tagged ‘Christianity’

God announces end to ‘working in mysterious ways’

The move has been welcomed by some of the Kingdom’s modernisers. ‘Don’t get me wrong: talking snakes, exploding shrubs and having at pharaohs with lots of frogs, all that was really out there. At the time, no other deity was doing that sort of thing. But times and have changed and we need to look forward.’

Read more >

Posted: Nov 28th, 2012
More from News In Brief



‘Essential for bishops to have willies’, says Church of England

Archbishop of Canterbury later showed everyone the new secret handshake‘Certain traditional offices of the bishop are in practice impossible to discharge unless endowed with a penis, and preferably a good long one.’

Read more >

Posted: Nov 21st, 2012
More from From The Archives



God finally agrees to save Queen

One is with GodAfter years of indecision and holy fights with his conscience, God has finally decided to save the Queen.

Read more >

Posted: Nov 18th, 2012
More from World News



Archbishop of Canterbury launches scathing attack on 1987 Ferguson video recorder

'One really is drawn towards the greater social moralism of Toshiba'Dr Williams accused the device, first rented from Rumbelows in 1987, of being ‘increasingly irrelevant’ in the corner of his lounge.

Read more >

Posted: Sep 11th, 2012
More from Faith



Christian clergy ‘waterboarding infants’ as rite of passage

confessed to everythingThe Christian church was today accused of employing enhanced interrogation techniques as part of a barbaric ritual for inducting babies and young children into the ways of the faith.

Read more >

Posted: Aug 14th, 2012
More from Faith