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Posts Tagged ‘christmas’

Turkeys consider ending ties with Christmas

The leader of the Turkeys Union for Christmas (TUC), Cluck McCluskey, has said his union is considering ending its ties with Christmas. The Grand Old Bird Brain Leader, or ‘Gobbler’ as the leader of the TUC is known, had previously hinted that he would encourage his members to down feathers

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Posted: May 22nd, 2015
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Secret Cliff Richard vault ‘not an urban myth’, warn experts

Reports that Sir Cliff Richard has a secret vault of music to be released after his death ‘may be true’ and not an urban myth, as once believed by music analysts.

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Posted: Mar 23rd, 2015
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Nottingham man abandons attempts to work out what day it is

As the festive season drags on, Nick Warren (59) of Nottingham has ceased trying to work out what day of the week it is.

‘I am pretty sure that Christmas Day was a Thursday, but there were three Saturdays in a row before that and since then it seems that Saturday and Sunday have alternated.’

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Posted: Dec 31st, 2014
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Man fights for life in Quality Street induced coma after festivities curtailed

A man is fighting for his life today after going ‘cold turkey’ following a Christmas eating binge. Dick Scales, 36, a much loved member of sleepy local seaside town Ringhersham remains in a ‘Stable, but critical condition’ following a sudden withdrawal of festive foodstuffs.

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Posted: Dec 30th, 2014
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12 dead in festive edition of Celebrity Total Wipeout – Extreme!

in the next series, those chosen by public vote can use RPGsThe BBC has scored a ratings hit this Christmas with a special edition of Celebrity Total Wipeout in which all 12 C-listers failed to stay the course and were stretchered off the show in coffins.

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Posted: Dec 29th, 2014
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