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Posts Tagged ‘clegg’

Election campaigns kick start five months of uninterrupted lying

best to hide under the sofa until it's all overWith fingers crossed, fidgeting and winking to the camera, Prime Minister David Cameron fired the starting pistol to the longest sustained stream of affluent effluent in electoral history. He was swiftly joined by the leaders of all the main political parties keen to shovel on extra dollops of steaming manifesto do-do’s and don’t-don’ts.

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Posted: Jan 4th, 2015
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Nick Clegg to use everyone’s paternity leave next year

another great idea!Anticipating he will have a lot of ‘free time on his hands’ after the next election, the Deputy Prime Minister has volunteered to provide round-the-clock support to all new parents. The Liberal Democrat’s’ manifesto will pledge that Mr. Clegg will stay with couples for up to six weeks after the birth of their child; providing nappy changing, reassuring hugs and amusing anecdotes about proportionate representation if ‘…baby refuses to go to sleep’.

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Posted: Aug 31st, 2014
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‘Yes’ to form coalition with ‘No’

none of the above came thirdTheir natural allies were ‘Meh’.

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Posted: May 26th, 2014
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Coalition back on track following successful team-building day

both parties now able to cope much better with 'yellow on blue' incidentsDowning Street has announced that the future of the Coalition Government is once again rosy after Cabinet ministers from both parties took part in a highly successful day of team-building exercises.

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2012
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Cameron to charge for access to Prime Minister’s Questions

all goes to worthy causes‘It’s only reasonable that Mr Cameron is fairly remunerated for his work at PMQs, especially now that he has to pay for his own dinners.’

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Posted: Mar 27th, 2012
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