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Posts Tagged ‘Cliff Richard’

Cliff ‘wired for sound’ during Cold War claim intelligence chiefs

Squeaky clean Sir Cliff went by the code name Harry Web-of-Deceit amongst Whitehall officials. Cliff’s paymasters gave the bachelor boy a brief to release soft pop ballads as a smokescreen for more clandestine activities. Having successfully established himself as a sleeper in the pop world he was ‘activated’ in 1968, during his performance of Eurovision entry, Congratulations, at London’s Albert Hall in 1968.

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Posted: Jun 19th, 2012
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Britain’s most punchable man ‘upset’ as title goes to Michael Gove

Mr Bedford says he will miss not having people taking a swing at him as soon as he opens his ‘big mouth’.

‘I realise now that realistically I didn’t have a chance against a public school educated swivel-eyed dwarf incessantly spouting bollocks,’ said Mr Bedford, before punching himself in the kisser.

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Posted: Jun 22nd, 2011
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Jesus retracts ‘bigger than the Beatles’ comment

Jesus H Christ, spiritual guru and star of church services and warm toast, has been forced to back down after comments that he is more popular than the Beatles right now.

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Posted: Oct 23rd, 2010
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Countdown begins for Christmas Day family hostage situation

passed down from generation to generation‘It’s become a kind of tradition,’ said mother of three, Mrs Tracy Grimshaws, ‘First the kids open their presents, then we have Christmas lunch, then my husband, Kevin goes and gets his gun.’

This year’s Christmas Day siege will come live from the home of the Grimshaws, Ventnor, Isle of Wight. ‘I have been holding my family hostage every Christmas day for the last 10 years’ said Kevin, ‘My father held his family hostage and his father before him. It’s what Christmas is all about.’

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Posted: Dec 24th, 2009
More from UK News



Cliff Richard forced to consider the ‘human cost’ of Mistletoe and Wine

will be remixing 'bachelor boy' with sleigh bells and releasing that insteadSir Cliff Richard has acted quickly to distance himself from perennial Christmas hit, ‘Mistletoe and Wine’ after a new Home Office report identified them as primary causes of drunkenness and adultery at office Christmas parties.

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Posted: Dec 13th, 2009
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