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The International Union for the Conservation of Nature (IUCN) has downgraded the survival prospects of Liberal Democrats, declaring the species officially ‘extinct in the wild’. Political conservationistshave been fighting for years to save the endangered creature (Latin name: Politicus ineptus) from dying out in its traditional habitats of university towns and the West Country. The [...]

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Posted: Jan 31st, 2012
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On the day the coalition have decided to look at shortening the adoption process, they have also announced they are putting Nick Clegg on the adoption list. The move comes as Conservative and Liberal Democrats argue over who shall have custody of Mr Clegg over the festive period.

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Posted: Dec 23rd, 2011
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British PM David Cameron today marked the 100th anniversary of the defeat of Captain Robert Scott in his quest to reach the South Pole, after being beaten by the Norwegian explorer Roald Amundsen.

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Posted: Dec 15th, 2011
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Scientists believe they may have recorded their first sighting of the elusive sub-political particle, the Clegg boson, otherwise known as The Sod Particle.

The Clegg’s existence has been postulated for some time as a means to resolving strange inconsistencies in the Standard Political Model, while remaining barely detectable itself.

‘The Clegg is very tiny and only capable of weak interactions,’ explained Professor Jim Al-Khalili, ‘However, despite exerting only a very small force, it appears to play a key role in providing the mass for some of the larger political elements.’

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Posted: Dec 13th, 2011
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Downing Street was embroiled in a fresh scandal today as it emerged that Prime Minister David Cameron may not have performed adequate checks on the individual he appointed to control the nation’s borders. It is alleged that in May 2010 he waived normal vetting procedures in allowing Theresa May to enter the office of Home Secretary.

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Posted: Nov 9th, 2011
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