Following the birth of his sixth child, Jacob Rees-Mogg has been placed in a breeding programme to help repopulate Britain with a new generation of Conservatives. Tory insiders fear that Britain’s young voters are excitedly swinging to the left and decided that some social engineering will be needed if the government is to continue not… [read...]
Is your lumbering, heavy manifesto slowing your system to a standstill? Is it causing your machine to fragment, or, worse, losing you a mandate? Try the Tory Manifesto ‘lite’. By jettisoning all unnecessary policy and cumbersome pledges, [read...]
Following the minority Conservative government’s so-called ‘confidence and supply’ deal with the DUP to buy the support of the DUP’s ten MPs at £100 million each for two years, a number of opposition MPs are also offering to sell their democratically elected souls for the same constituency-pimping price on the basis they may as well… [read...]
While austerity continues to bite across the UK, the Conservatives have unveiled plans to release previously unspent cash known to be hidden in trees, rainbows, waterfalls and other supernatural dwellings, to invest in public services and infrastructure in Northern Ireland, [read...]
We all know the real reason Theresa May called the election when she did. Another year and the breed of hyper-intelligent hominids known as Homo Superior would have gained a voting majority. Many feel that she should have let evolution take its course and handed the reins to a more evolved, [read...]
