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Posts Tagged ‘Cyril Smith’

Scientists research into Lib Dem ‘wobble’ shows applied left and right forces

it's just life in a gaited communityLurching from left to right, the Lib Dem ‘wobble’ has baffled scientists for years. Finally, research conducted by Penguin watchers at London Zoo may have unlocked the key to this seemingly inefficient party’s means of mobilisation.

Electronic plates were installed in the corridors of Westminster and BBC studios to measure the level of lurch to the left or right. As Lib Dems trod these paths, scientists were able to gauge how a Lib Dem politician propels himself in political life.

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Posted: Mar 17th, 2015
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Nonces ‘appalled’ by allegations that some might be MPs

‘I haven’t been able to sleep since these allegations started. What will my family think of me? I can’t leave my own home – kids have painted ‘MP scum’ on my front door.

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Posted: Jul 21st, 2014
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Government orders inquiry into why cover-up did not work

'Have they gone yet?'George Osborne has commissioned an immediate inquiry into why the cover-up of alleged child abuse by high profile Westminster figures did not work.

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Posted: Jul 8th, 2014
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Lord Rennard to play Cyril Smith in Lib Dem biopic

‘Cyril was brilliant at connecting with young voters, especially young men,’ said an excited Lord Rennard. ‘Similarly, I have succeeded in getting into more young women at parties – er, I mean getting more young women into the party.’

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Posted: Jun 2nd, 2014
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