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Posts Tagged ‘David Cameron’

Cameron calls for calm in the worsening Bake Off conflict

Tart!The UN is calling for air-strikes to intervene after Diana Beard, a 69 year-old WI activist from Shropshire, was filmed taking a bearded combatant’s ice-cream out of the freezer during the Great British Bake Off.

‘It was only for 40 seconds or so,’ she protested to UN observers. Billionaire Peace Envoy Tony Blair tweeted from the safety of his villa in Tuscany, ’45 seconds is all it takes. We cannot stand idly by. #ToldYouSo #MyPlaceInHistory.’

President Obama, in an unusually hawkish mood issued a statement stating that ‘Atrocities against baked Alaska are just unacceptable’. More swiftly than usual he decisively did nothing. A congressman summed up a grim situation: ‘Great Britain is a small country with most of its inhabitants forced into a narrow strip of land to the south facing the sea. The people have literally no-where to go, it is a siege.’

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Posted: Aug 28th, 2014
More from Arts/Entertainment



Cameron appeals for ‘calm’ so he can at least finish one holiday this year

wearing Bermuda shorts and ready to go again at a moment's noticeDavid Cameron has today called for ‘calm’ throughout the world and at home, after yet another holiday had to be interrupted.

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Posted: Aug 19th, 2014
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Scottish voters urged to consider Salmond’s ‘big pleading eyes’

In a last-ditch attempt to swing the vote in the Scottish independence referendum , the ‘Yes’ camp has launched a series of posters and television advertisements sponsored by the RSPCA.

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Posted: Aug 10th, 2014
More from Politics



PM unveils curbs on ‘exploitative, degrading, irritating’ Royal baby coverage

determined to shut down access to baby pornEvery household in the UK is to have endless, vacuous reporting of the birth and infancy of the Royal baby blocked by their internet provider unless they choose to receive it, David Cameron has announced.

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Posted: Aug 2nd, 2014
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Poor people to be allowed access to landfill sites at mealtimes

someone found a lobster once‘Someone found a lobster once’

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Posted: Jul 23rd, 2014
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