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Posts Tagged ‘Death’

Lung cancer still looks ‘way cool’, say scientists

exclusive club, but always open to new membersScientists and ‘guys with leather jackets’ have hailed the number of smokers across the world reaching the one billion mark as a ringing endorsement of nicotine, pulmonary disease, Dot Cotton and everyone who has appeared in a French film ever.

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Posted: Jan 15th, 2014
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Cancer still fatal despite NHS Facebook page

‘Fatal diseases are still by-passing our leafleting campaigns,’ admitted Health Minister Jeremy Hunt. ‘The NHS leads the world in leafleting and our use of Facebook as a distribution medium is world-class, so the latest figures are particularly disappointing.’

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Posted: Dec 10th, 2013
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Humanity needs hope to cope with fear of eternal life, says Dawkins

death now excluded as an optionRichard Dawkins has today admitted that his apparent belief in a bleak godless existence is all a lie founded on a fear of the afterlife. He says that people simply cannot accept that their eternal soul is going to live on indefinitely, even after their physical bodies rot.

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Posted: Oct 31st, 2013
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IKEA fire claims 130 stuck on way through

The blaze took hold slowly over the course of 20 minutes, during which many of the fatalities were observed on CCTV developing a morbid urge to keep perusing. 100 of the dead were found with a packet of scented tea lights, a set of pillow cases and a Malmosk.

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Posted: Sep 27th, 2013
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Half of UK population ‘will die in the future’

At least half of the current UK population will die of something fatal at some point in the future, a stark new medical report has suggested.

Eternal Life Research Group Plc., which commissioned the report, has said that the country is facing a ‘medical time bomb’ and the Government needs to take action now.

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Posted: Jun 8th, 2013
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